I rolled out of bed at 5:35 a.m. I was out the door by 6:00 a.m., wearing multiple layers. It was 24° with a wind chill of 14°. Dark. Ice covering the sidewalks from the terrible weather we’ve had the last couple of days.
I was supposed to run 6 miles.
6 miles on a Tuesday morning, solo, on icy roads, in the cold.
Just short of 3 miles, my left foot slipped on a patch of slick ice. My right foot was already up in the air. Down on my butt I went. I was a big kid, didn’t cry, didn’t whimper, just picked myself up, limped a few feet, and took off again. At mile 3 I took my iPhone out of my pocket to check the time. It fell, and I heard a crunch. The screen was shattered.
I quit. I walked home, only having run half my miles, ready to quit this crazy stupid training program.
I’m tired of running in the dark. I’m tired of running in the cold. I’m tired of running for hours alone. I’m tired of 3-mile runs on the treadmill because it’s not worth bundling up to run outside for that little time.
I’m just tired. Always. And hungry. Always always always hungry.
I hate marathon training. There. I said it.
Maybe I should give up now and plan to run one in October, when I can train in warmer, less-icy weather.
Maybe I should wait to find a training partner. [There's a group of runners I follow on Twitter. They run together every week. They run half marathons and trail races and marathons and 50Ks and 50-milers. Together. They train together. They count miles together. They do early-bird morning runs together. I want that. Bad. So bad.]
I. Hate. It.
And I’ll be out running 3 more miles after work to finish my mileage for the day. Of course. Because I said I’d run a marathon, and I do what I say I will. I never give up, right?
Don’t stop now, you have come so far. Chances are it’s all up from here. Find something to get you re-motivated. Have you tried running at different times or totally change your route? Do a long run on the treadmill while watching a movie. Switch it up get a fresh take and you are going to kick that Marathons @#s!
Thanks Keith. I’m glad I got out and finished the run that night.
What a frustrating way to start the day. Looks like you could use some motivation. Last year a blogger I follow wrote a post that I bookmarked about running and keeping at it. I use it to motivate me when I don’t feel like running that day. Here’s the link:
http://tinyurl.com/WhyDoIDoThis
You can do this, Jes! You’ve done it before. It’ll be worth it when they’re putting that 26.2 on your other leg.
I think you almost made me cry a little! Hells yes I’m getting the 26.2 on my right leg!
I hate to be negative on this topic, but I’d chime in with your inner whiner here. Running long distances pre-work in the cold, dark North is a pain in the ass, and it’s higher risk. I just signed up for the Disney Half with Yanni and Kendra in September, and the date was part of it – I just can’t run outside right now.
I’m glad it’s not just me. I’m so ready for spring already.