I was supposed to run 6 miles.

6 miles on a Tuesday morning, solo, on icy roads, in the cold.

Just short of 3 miles, my left foot slipped on a patch of slick ice. My right foot was already up in the air. Down on my butt I went. I was a big kid, didn’t cry, didn’t whimper, just picked myself up, limped a few feet, and took off again. At mile 3 I took my iPhone out of my pocket to check the time. It fell, and I heard a crunch. The screen was shattered.

I quit. I walked home, only having run half my miles, ready to quit this crazy stupid training program.

I’m tired of running in the dark. I’m tired of running in the cold. I’m tired of running for hours alone. I’m tired of 3-mile runs on the treadmill because it’s not worth bundling up to run outside for that little time.

I’m just tired. Always. And hungry. Always always always hungry.

I hate marathon training. There. I said it.

Maybe I should give up now and plan to run one in October, when I can train in warmer, less-icy weather.

Maybe I should wait to find a training partner. [There's a group of runners I follow on Twitter. They run together every week. They run half marathons and trail races and marathons and 50Ks and 50-milers. Together. They train together. They count miles together. They do early-bird morning runs together. I want that. Bad. So bad.]

I. Hate. It.

And I’ll be out running 3 more miles after work to finish my mileage for the day. Of course. Because I said I’d run a marathon, and I do what I say I will. I never give up, right?

January 2, 2012, I ran 3.1 miles on Day 31. So, the answer is, yes, I can run every day for 31 days. Here I am, at mile 2.25, today. It was 17F, with 30 mph wind gusts, and the sidewalks were ice-covered. FUN. Hello, winter.

So, I ran every day for 31 days. I ran 64.5 miles. I ran in the morning, and at lunch, and after work, and late in the evening. I ran on the treadmill, and outdoors. I ran happy, mad, tired, hungry, stuffed, and hurting.

But I DID IT.

The first week was tiring, but inspiring. I was motivated. I could do this!

The second week, I found myself missing morning workouts and being grumpy about it. I made them up, and resolved to get better at sticking to a schedule.

The third week was amazing. I was energized, I enjoyed the runs, and I had some good times.

The fourth week was misery. I was tired. My legs were tired. My left knee is still throbbing.

What did I learn? It can be done. It’s best to set a schedule and stick to it – it was easier to make time for the runs when I told myself I had to run first thing in the morning. There will be a lot more laundry. I’d rather run longer distances 3-5 times per week than short runs 7 days a week.

It was a great challenge for the month of December. I can see doing this next year, but mixing it up a little – perhaps 5 days running, 1 day of other cardio, and 1 day of yoga or Pilates.

What’s next?

A week of rest (OK, at least four days), and then training for 26.2 starts!

in 2012, i am going to be more. i am going to do more.

i am going to run a marathon. the full 26.2 miles. be upright and smiling at the end. [who wants to run the Wisconsin Marathon with me on May 5?] i need that 26.2 tattoo on my right calf, to match the 13.1 on my left calf.

i am going to run 1,200 miles. this? this seems impossible. but that’s what i said about 500. and who am i without ridiculous goals?

i am going to run a half marathon for Team Challenge WI to raise money for Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation. i will not let this disease make more of my friend’s lives hard without doing something about it.

i am going to run the Hartman’s Creek 25K Trail Race on September 9.

i will run in 5 more states.

[i wasn't going to post this. i'm feeling selfish and withdrawn today. but who reads this, anyway?]

I ran 656.94 miles. I could have run to Cleveland to visit Erin, Allen, and Brian, and still had miles to spare!

I ran for over 117 hours.

I ran in 8 states: Wisconsin, Illinois, Missouri, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Oregon, Washington, and California.

I ran 5 5Ks – Shamrock Shuffle, Sole Burner, EAA Runway, PaceSetters XCountry, and Race For The Light.

I ran the Warrior Dash.

I ran the 5-mile Turkey Trot.

Best of all, I ran 2 half-marathons, Oshkosh, WI and Portland, OR.

The Jes of one year ago wouldn’t believe this. But I do.

But it is truly the people that support me running that awes me. The people that have run miles with me. The people that cheer me on via Runmeter and Twitter. The friends and family that are along the side of the road and at the finish line, cheering me on. My husband, who comes out in pouring rain to catch video and pictures of me running. All of you mean so much to me I can’t express it in words. I run for myself, but I couldn’t do it by myself, not every day.

2011? Epic.

2012? Going bigger.

1. Sunday, October 9 - Portland Half Marathon. To date, this was the best race of my life. I wish I could run with all of these people every day.

i love these people. love.

2. Sunday, April 16 - Oshkosh Half Marathon. My very first half marathon. The weather was horrible, but I DID IT. I ran a half marathon. I had the biggest grin of all time on my face after.

can you hear the "squeeee!"?

3. Wednesday, October 12 - #sqlrun – Seattle, WA. I was in Seattle for a SQL conference. I wanted to run with Steve. Then Grant mentioned he wanted to run with us. Why not ask Brian, and Doug, and Bill, and Allen to run, too? I organized a group run, expecting about 15 people. Over 40 showed up. We ran about 2-1/2 miles through downtown and along the waterfront. That was fun. I met people I never would have, otherwise. People thanked me for organizing it. I’ll be organizing this again next year.

just a few geeks, out for a run

4. Saturday, October 29. This was a six mile run on a gorgeous autumn day. I ran west of town, out in farm land. There was an apple tree every quarter mile or so, bursting with ripe red apples, and I kept wanting to stop, climb the tree, and eat one. Autumn days are my favorite.

5. Saturday, June 18. I ran 10 miles, my longest run since my half marathon. It was a perfect morning – sunny and 55º, with a light breeze. I ran south of town, along the lake. It’s a route I don’t run often, so it felt fresh and new. All I could think, at the end, was, “I feel ALIVE.”

6. Saturday, September 3 – birthday run! It was gray, cold, and misting rain, but it was beautiful. I ran out to my favorite point along the lake and back. I passed the library and its lions, the fallout shelter, my first apartment, and other favorite Places in Oshkosh. There is no place in the world like this point.

i love this Place

7. Sunday, March 27 – #sqlrun – Addison, IL. I was in town for a SQL Saturday. I was training for my half marathon. I made a run date with Brian, Allen and Mike. For 9 miles, we talked and talked and talked. I got running advice from Allen, who’s run over 50 marathons. I talked about crazy races I want to run with Mike. And Brian had blue Gatorade waiting for me at the end. Afterwards, we had a bacon-loaded breakfast before scattering our separate ways. They are a great group of guys that I want to run with far more often than I get the chance to.

8. Saturday, March 12 – Shamrock Shuffle 5K. I set a smashing new PR with 28:50 – the half marathon training was paying off. I told Jeremy and Lesley I would try to keep up with them. They left me in the dust after the first mile, but I stayed strong. I’m still trying to beat this time.

the Jaycee crew.

9. Saturday, June 11 – #sqlrun – Columbus, OH. Erin and I got up early to run 2 miles before SQL Saturday. I’d wanted to go for a run with Erin for a very long time. The 20 or so minutes flew past as we talked about why we started running, and why we were still doing it. I’d like to think we worked off the beers and cheese we’d enjoyed the night before, too.

10. Sunday, June 12 – #sqlrun – Columbus, OH. Before parting ways, I wanted to run with Brian and Allen. We went out to a park and ran 4 miles. It was beautiful. We talked running, and SQL, and friendships, and beer. I may be shorter than both of them by a foot, but I try to keep up with their pace! I remember flying the last half mile with Allen at a 9:00 pace. That was fun.

11. Saturday, February 26 – A brutal 8-mile run in below-zero temperatures. What was I thinking? I learned a lot from this run. Mostly, don’t run when temperatures are in single digits, and when you do, water not close to your body will freeze. It will take hours for you to warm up after.

It was an epic year. I can’t wait to see what I do in the future.

For the second year in a row, I decided to run the Festival Foods Turkey Trot Thanksgiving morning. I can have an extra helping of that green bean casserole guilt-free then! I signed up for the 5-mile run. My goal was to run it in under 50:00. I’ve done great at distance runs this year, but I have a hard time cranking up the speed on short runs.

Awake at 6:30 a.m. Check the weather – 37°F and drizzle. Long sleeves, waterproof jacket, tights. Coffee, banana, water, and out the door I go. I got to the convention center, found parking, and made my way to the starting line. I had just enough time beforehand to run into and catch up with some old friends, out with their son before the festivities of the day. That was a great start!

I did have to giggle once. There were about 3,500 people at the race. A woman in line at the start said, “Wow, this race is so big!” Having just run in Portland with 15,000 other people, I was reminded of how your perspective can change in just a single day. Once, running with 1,000 other people was a lot. Once, running one mile was a lot. As we grow, and experience new things, and change, our perspective changes too.

We started oh-so-promptly at 8:00 a.m. The race wound through the north side of Oshkosh, heading towards Lake Winnebago. We ran along the lake and through the park, then headed east for the final mile. It was cold and drizzly, with a biting wind along the lake. I didn’t mind, though. I kept reminding myself of how much better it was than my race in April. And from this picture, captured at about mile 2-1/2, you can hardly tell I’m cold and miserable!

Courtesy of The Northwestern

Mile 1 was easy. I had to keep myself in check, and remind myself I was running a few more miles. Mile 2 flowed nicely as well, as the scenery changed and the lake came into view. Mile 3 was fun, as one of the volunteers was my former boss, and I got to say hi and high-five him. My music was perfect. I was in The Zone. Mile 4 I started to struggle a little. I can tell I haven’t been running as many miles as usual. I’m getting tired. Just as I crossed the “mile 4″ marker, I heard a group of guys chattering behind me. I thought, “What the heck? Quiet down! I’m trying to focus here!” When I saw them pass me, I realized why there was all the chatter:

Courtesy of The Northwestern

Yes, I was just passed by Pac-Man and three ghosts! I busted out laughing, and picked up the pace so I could keep them in sight the last mile. I cruised through mile 5, and turned up the jets the last tenth to cross the finish line.

I was rewarded with an official chip time of 48:54! It’s my second-best 5-mile time, and my best 5-mile race time. I’ll take it! Plus, I got to run after Pac-Man.

And the pumpkin cheesecake was fantastic.

to feel the ground beneath my feet. to see the blue, blue sky. to breathe in fall-crisp air. to go just one more step, one more, to run farther than i ever have before.

to know my body has become a well-tuned machine. to feel a step from my little toe, up through my calf, following the tendon around my knee, into my thigh, around my hip, inside my abdomen, breath in my lungs, heart pumping blood, arms swinging, wind on my face, one drop of sweat rolling down my forehead. i feel it all, simultaneously.

i am alive.

there are bad days. days i hate running. i hate the fear, and the sweat, and the gasping for breath, and the sore muscles, and the hills, and the traffic, and my goals.

there are days laying on the floor, doing nothing, would be easier.

but there is this day:

and this day:

and this day:

and those are the days that make this all worth it. that make me Know i was Meant To Do This.

On Sunday, October 9, I ran the 2nd Annual Portland Half Marathon. I ran 13.1 miles through the streets of Portland, OR. I set a new PR, with 2:17:58. I laughed, I cried, I high-fived spectators. I did it.

But this was so much more than a run.

Ray of Hope 

I ran this race to raise money for Ray of Hope, a small charity in Portland, OR. And by small, I mean small. Around $50K in operating budget a year. One part-time staff member and a few volunteers. But they change lives. Lots of lives. Through their clinics and schools in Kenya, they are making life better for people.

The night before the race, I got to attend a pasta dinner at the home of a supporter. Here, I met Dr Teresa Gipson, the woman who started it all. I met Jeska, a woman from Kenya whose life was changed by this charity, who brought me (and everyone else in the room) to tears. I met other amazing volunteers who give their time and money to help others. I could not have asked my family, friends, and colleagues to donate to a better cause. I know that every penny I raised helps these people.

Me, with a woman that will inspire and amaze me for always, Dr. Gipson

My Friends

But the best part of this adventure was, hands down, running with eight dear friends.

Nine. Nine people who have met through SQL events and Twitter. Nine people, drawn together by their love of community and running and helping others. Doug ran the 10 K Downhill Dash, and killed it in 42:00. Allen ran the full marathon, and wowed me with 5:39. I got to run the half with Erin, Yanni, Karen, Rob D, Brent, and Rob F.

i love these people. love.

Erin finished first, and was waiting for me after I got my medal and my space blanket. You know what’s better than getting your finish line photo taken? Getting it taken with one of your best friends. We ate our way down food alley (Portland has the best post-race food of all time, ever), where we met up with Rob D. We got our t-shirts, trees, and pendants (Portland also has the best post-race swage of all time, ever), then headed to the Ray of Hope booth to change into dry clothes. Then, we got to cheer Yanni across the finish line of her FIRST half marathon. Yanni, who was in chemotherapy one year ago, has now climbed a mountain and run a half marathon. She is amazing. We cheered on Karen as she powered through the race. We high-fived Rob F, who came all the way from Australia for this. We cheered on Brent, who was all smiles as he passed us.

In the end, we hugged and cheered and cried, and had an amazing lunch together. I cannot believe I was lucky enough to be part of this experience.

If you’re interested in checking up on the (awesome) #sqlrun #pdxmarathon11 group, here are our bib numbers:

Jes – 33325

Erin - 33129

Yanni - 33285

Karen - 33108

Rob D - 33121

Rob F - 33409

Doug -

Brent - 33152

Allen -

The race begins at 7:00 a.m. Pacific time Sunday morning. Please cheer us on! We’re excited to be doing this together!

Hint: the most important thing ever of all time about this race is at the bottom of this post. But yes, I’m going to make you read the rest of it first.

I’m training for the Portland Half Marathon, which I’ll be running in SIX DAYS, to support Ray of Hope! This is a very small organization that provides medical care and schooling to children and families in a small village and a slum in Kenya. I am delighted, thrilled and amazed that I have reached my fundraising goal of $1,000. I have amazing, generous friends, family and colleagues.